oh my god oh my god. boys are so so so lovely.
so confusing. but so lovely.
i abandoned this blog a while back because it's quite awful. however, now i have mentionitis of mr boy(a new one, not the one previously mentioned) and i have had to stop talking about him because my friends are going to kill me soon.
so i'm going to write on here about it.
he's soooooooooo lovely! i'm not sure what we are yet. it's definately some sort of relationship, but he says he's not my boyfriend. hmmm. is that a huge problem? i've only known him about 3 weeks though, so i dunno. maybe i'm just too obsessed.

I hate this stage of a relationship. The part just before you know where you stand. Maybe it's just me who goes through this phase.

Actually, boys are not lovely at all. Boys are pretty shit. My friend's boy has cheated on her 3 times that I know of, and she still goes back to him, and is completely happy to leave him at home while she's at uni. See, this is what men do to girls. They make them absolutely crazy - they do things that they would never usually think were normal.

My boy - well, let's just call him mine - keeps telling me that he'll end up hurting me so i shouldn't get involved, but he's so lovely, and even if that's true, you can't just turn off your feelings can you? Well I know I can't. Plus, I suppose most people think they can change a person as well.

It's so bizarre. I'm talking to Chris my ex about mr boy, my possible future. Scary business, this friends post relationship thing.

I think he does really like me. mr boy, not Chris.

OK.

Reasons that suggest he really likes me:

he danced with me even though he hates dancing
he doesn't want to have sex because it complicates things
but he does want to have sex
he tells me I'm beautiful
he tells me I'm sexy
he kisses my head
he strokes me
he cuddles me and kisses my neck and my collarbone
he feels safe with me
he thinks i look nice without makeup on
he worries about me talking to randomers
he doesn't let me walk home alone
it didn't scare him when he thought i was referring to him as my boyfriend
he says we're good together
he referred to us as 'us'
he wants me to be honest with him about how i feel
he referred to us as a relationship


Reasons that suggest he's not arsed:

he's said he's never got over rosie
he takes ages to text back
i don't see him alot
he didn't kiss me the other night
i'm not clear on where we stand with each other
i go to his more than he comes here

now, what i'm trying to work out, is whether the pro list is only bigger because i want it to be... but i can't think of that many reasons. Also, I read somewhere that the human brain has evolved to look for the negatives so we can like, be prepared, and then kill it. So, hopefully it's just my mind that is obsessed with the negative side of things for no reason.

feel so much better for making that list.

i wish i was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair