melancholy (the noun not the adjective)

It's far too hot in the house. I've just come from my best friend B's house, which was considerably cooler. I feel quite uncomfortable.
I also feel quite teary. I'm going to miss my best mate so much when she goes travelling (in three months). I'm so jealous of everything about her. Not in a mean way. I wouldn't want to take it from her. But I wish I was as good at everything. She's so beautiful. I mean, way gorgeous. She's the kind of girl that all guys see and their jaw hangs off. I mean, completely stunning. And she's petite as well, beautiful 6/8 figure. That's UK sizes. She's a US 2/4. And she fitted a size zero dress from donna karen earlier in the year. Basically, she's the girl you want to look like. *sigh* and it doesnt' help that I'm alot bigger than her, and also just generally less attractive.
Plus she's really really clever. She got a million A*s at GCSE (ok, who didn't?) but she also got 4 As at A level. And she's going travelling to south america and she's working at this uber cool cafe in manchester to pay for it, and she's got amazing fashion sense, and a million expensive clothes that she looks like a model in. After she goes travelling she's going to uni in london. To King's College. Basically, she's going to have the best life ever.
I'm so jealous of the London thing. I was supposed to go to UCL in London. But then I got a B in English instead of an A, so I couldn't. It was the worst day of my life. Actually. I'm still really really gutted about it. I regret it completely. But there's nothing I can do now.
It's jsut really got me down today. I cant' stop thinking about it.
God, I'm actually welling. That's so stupid. Anyway, basically, I just really adore my best friend, and she's everything I would love to be. But can't.
And I'm really going to miss her when she goes. But I know she'll have the best time. :) Cheers for B.