Last night was lovely. Candles and blankets and a warm breeze in the garden. Skinned up lots. Lovely housemates. It was lovely lovely lovely.
Oh, and the boys tried to steal a bench.
:)
I love my friends.
The new therapist is nicer than the old one.

I've been doing some work, which is good. But it's a bit harder than I had previously imagined, which isn't good. I think I need to organise a meeting with my project supervisor.
The boy I like called me yesterday, I have lots of clothes coming on Tuesday in the post, the garden's had a makeover, and I have the house to myself. These are all really good things. I need to make myself do some work so that I can go home at the weekend and go to this party that's important to me, and maybe see the Boy :)
I'm watching anime and eating marmite on toast to help me stay sane. good tactic, actually.
I have no idea what I've been up to since I last posted. Mostly because I can't remember when I last posted. I think it was mostly just Easter stuff. I was home, worked for two weeks, saw friends and got drunk. The last week the Boy spent a week at mine while my parents were away. We got high alot and had many lovely talks, food, and hugs.
OH. Something else which is really good that I'd forgotten, I have printer ink! :)
This is the most retarded post.
But I don't care because I need to dooo things.

life metaphor?

Oh my head. oh dear. strongbow is not a friend of my head right now. I met up with a load of people I haven't seen in aaaaaages though. Very nice. Very good. Yes.
The sun isn't shining anymore, but it's still temperate and lovely. I'm going to go to my friend's now. Such a lovely boy. I'll sleep and doze and play with his cats and then go to a partee.
Nice times.

hummingbirds can't walk. racism part II

So, I'm not even sure how it began. But we had an argument about race in our house.
It definitely started out from one comment, but it's difficult to remember exactly what it was. I think one of the boys I live with made a jokey comment about how a girl I live with (we'll call her T-race-y - get it?) makes racist comments to her friend from home when she calls him. I'm pretty sure that was one of the starting things. Also, at some point, she said that she was glad another of our housemates wasn't black. Which I thought was really strange.
I'm not recounting this well.
Anyway, there were four housemates (including me) who were anti racism, and there were two expressing racist opinions. Although later, one of them decided that actually he wasn't racist, he just didn't like the big gangs that hang around in his city (whether they're white or not). So mostly it was just Tracey fighting her own corner.
It always really shocks me when I encounter racism. I don't live in a very multicultural area, so it isn't a topic that comes up often with alot of people I know. Whenever I have experienced it, it's really upset me and caught me off guard. And something I really hate is that you can really get on with someone well, and you think they're the loveliest person, but then you can find out this really awful part of them. And once you know, you can't ever look at them the same way, and you always feel a little bit uncomfortable.
How can a person be so lovely and seemingly normal and rational in every other aspect, but be ignorant and bigoted and essentially, just stupid. Because that's what racism is, it's just stupid.
The worst part about the whole thing (and it was pretty dire, I mean, I had to keep leaving the room because I got so angry and upset) was that her concluding argument was 'Well I don't have the facts, so I can't argue back, so I'm just going to leave'. She admitted that she didn't know any facts about levels of asylum and the percentage of immigrants in the country. But she didn't recognise, even after I pointed it out to her, that a lack of knowledge is exactly why she shouldn't have that opinion. She just kept saying 'well I'm allowed my opinion' but when that's what her opinion is, then I really don't think she should be allowed her own opinion.
The things she said were ridiculous and plentiful. Like, it isn't her fault that she's a racist because she lives in a white area, so she's never met a black person. So? I've never met an innuit, but I know they're human. They're no different to anybody else. How can she be so blindly stupid?
She didn't even understand stupidly simple ideas, like why it's worse for someone who isn't black to use the 'n' word than it is for a black person to use it. She couldn't understand why the historical significance of slavery and black oppression affects anything.
There's so much that she said that was wrong. Not just that she shouldn't have said it, because it's taboo, but that the things she stated were incorrect.
She was stupid, and ridiculous, and stubborn and blind. And I hate it. And I can't forget it.

you're more likely to have a heart attack in the morning. Racism part I

I heard this conversation today. It appalled me.
Lady A, was describing to Ladies B and C this piece of footage she'd seen on the tv. She said it was a muslim man cutting off the head of a soldier. I assume she meant that the soldier was western in appearance. I'm not sure why she imagined the assailant must be muslim. Because religion, as insane as it is, does not appear as a physical characteristic. What I must assume, is that she meant the man was an arab.
But it got worse. She started describing what they were doing before they murdered him, and was saying that they were shouting and talking to each other, 'in muslim'. In muslim??? Are you kidding? So you mean in Arabic then. Arghhhhhh!
I cannot articulate how much this stresses me out. Why is it, in her mind, okay to say 'muslim language' but not describe English as 'Christian language'? You don't have to be foreign to be muslim! It's a belief! Millions of Indians are Christian, for example! It's just an idea! It isn't something you're born with and must die with. For fuck's sake! I don't often use exclamation marks, but seriously. Does she not have a brain?
I realise how harsh and awful I sound, but it makes me really really upset that people don't even think through what they're saying, or what they've heard and are repeating.
They proceded to use extremist language. Lots of thems and theys. And were complaining about how minority groups get offended when fun is had at their expense. I for one do get irritated by the fact that Muslim groups do tend to overreact to things (for example when the cartoon of Mohammed was printed and all hell broke loose). Because lots of people poke fun at images of Jesus and stuff and no one bats an eyelid. Even when Jerry Springer the opera came out, no one threatened the lives of the people staging it.
So I do see the point that some groups do overreact more than others. However, they then started rationalising this opinion by saying that 'gays make fun of themselves'. Even if this is true (have they surveyed any homosexual populations?) why does that mean others can make fun of them?
Then they concluded by saying that essentially, they should just accept that people are going to have a pop, because they are in a minority.
Welcome, victims of torture, refugees, asylum seekers. You are in a minority. In Britain, this means we can make fun of you as much as we want, and you can't complain. Okay?
Jesus.
I really hate that I get on with these people. And in other situations they're perfectly agreeable, lovely people. It's just (as if just is the right word) if you're of another race that they become irrational and ridiculous.
God.
There is so much more that I could say on this issue. But I should sleep. So I can go to work and not be tired and lose my rag if more of this shit comes up.

So good to be home. Lovely bed, everything is clean, lots of food, always warm. Absolutely amazing.
Lovely friends, lovely money, lovely car :)
!!!!!
Stupid work, but stupid work = lovely money, which = Diana F+ camera !!
Twitter will help me through the working week anyway. Tweet tweet.
Sleep now. Or at least relax away from a screen.
Mmm wine.